January 20, 2013

Okay, here is the deal, and I don't tell too many people, so don't spread it around:

I SUCK AT GARDENING.

Add to this the following challenges:

1. Evil ground squirrels (like gophers on steroids because they can climb OVER the screened-in raised beds you set up to keep the evil gophers away); 
2. I am apparently in the migration route of blackbirds, crows, magpies, and scrub jays, as well as a few orioles who all stop to grab a quick snack of my veggies and fruits on their way to warmer climes;
3. Dirt that is red clay until you get down to about four inches, at which point it turns into rock;
4. Free-range chickens who think it is their one mission in life to find a way into the garden, so they can take dust baths in the raised beds, scattering plants and exposing roots as they go;
5. Ground squirrels, who are just so evil, they deserve a second mention.

And yet, somehow, I have always managed to have a few successes among my abysmal failures.  Last year, I grew a bumper crop of tomatoes, while the squirrels ate all my garlic.  The year before that, the garlic grew at a phenomenal rate, but I didn't get a single bloom on the tomatoes.  One asparagus bed flourishes, while the other withers.  So, forever the optimist, I continue to beat myself up every year, thinking this will be the year that it all works out.

I decided, this year, to document my actions, so that I can see what I did right and what I did wrong, and maybe learn from my mistakes.

So, today, I cleaned out the old beds in last year's garden.  I already know this garden has problems.  It was the only flat area near the house I could find, so I used it, but it gets shaded in both the morning and the evening by oak and pine trees.  The trees shade the chicken coop and also provide shade for the livestock, and I also hate to kill living things, so having them removed is not an option.

Last year, the tomatoes did well in this garden, but they shaded out all the other veggies (the ones that survived the critters, anyway), so I am going to use this garden, this year, as my cool weather garden and populate it with veggies that don't need a lot of sun:  lettuces, spinach, garlic, etc.

(That bed in the back, upper-left, portion of the garden is the new compost bin.)

So this, of course, raises the obvious question:  where will the sun-loving vegetables (and fruit, if you are a tomato-purist) be planted?  I have my eye on a beauty of a spot, but it will take a lot of time and money (both of which always seem to be in short supply) to prepare it, so I MIGHT have to resort to container planting this spring, if I can't swing it by planting time.

Here is the plan:

This large flat area might just be perfect for a real ranch garden.  It is exposed, with very few trees that can shade it.  It is relatively level and relatively free of stones.  It is close enough to the house to run water to it.  I can envision large beds of corn, sprawling vines of zucchini and cucumbers, tomatoes busting out of their cages.

Can the squirrels and birds still attack it?  Yes, but I will have that problem regardless of where I place it, so I didn't see that as a limiting factor.

What it NEEDS is a good strong fence around the two exposed sides, to keep curious goats and donkeys at bay.   That is where the money and time come in.  I do know my limitations (even though I push them sometimes), and I don't think I can muscle a 200 pound railroad tie into the ground.  Well, maybe one.  But then I'd be in the hospital for a while, and it would take FOREVER to get this garden fenced! 

In addition to this, I want to expand my existing herb garden (thank you to whoever planted that before I moved in) and add to my small orchard of fruit and nut trees.   I need to inventory what I have and figure out a better way of keeping track of what is what because tags fall off, and I am left wondering if I am looking at a plum or a nectarine, a walnut or a pecan tree.

And that is the plan.  Let's see what happens!